I'm off to see the Not-Wizard
And this morning I was working on my compilation of stories and snippets from the blog,when I came across this post in which I wish to be doing the very thing that I am doing!!!!
I was wishing to go to Montana...
So, read it and weep.
Or sleep.
Or...beep.
It was originally posted on bored housewife on June 21, 2005.
And I skipped the first half of the post where I talk about the fact that I am drunk, and ask you all to vote on whether drunk posting is better or coffee-high posting.
have a great weekend, and I'll see you back here on Monday!
recycled post:
maybe I'm not meant to be "normal"!!!!!!
huh?
did you ever think of THAT, oh mr. wizard behind the curtain in the emerald city of OZ???
you fucking jackass prick son of a whore!
I don't have to be a soccer mom.
I don't have to cook dinner every night
I don't have to love housewifery (which, despite phonetic similarities, is not related in any way to "animal husbandry"...ok, scratch phonetic similarities...more like general word similarities. it sounded uppity-er the first way, though.)
I do still want to fly.
I'm glad i can be bothered to use italics even when I'm floating in a sort of dizzy haze of happy fermented grapes smooshed up and processed in whatever-the-fuck way they are processed to turn into wine......
I want to be smooshed up and poured into a bottle...
would you drink me?
with a delicate pasta, and some insanely difficult to pronounce and/or prepare sauce?
I used to dream of culinary arts institutionalization...
or degree-ification.
chef-dom?
whatever.
but, as with all my dreams, I soon woke up--
which I don't mean in the vernacular of "came to my senses."
no.
I mean, literally, REM faded, eyes stopped twitching, snoring abated, bladder cleared its throat impatiently--
awakening.
of the every-morning variety.
I want Julie.
the other one.
I want to hitchhike to Montana and show up on her doorstep.
I want to drink coffee and be deep and serious--
for 5 minutes, at least.
then, I want to laugh so loud
so hysterically
so guffaw-ically
sooooooooooooooo..........
satisfactorily.
and hear her latest tales of love--
for they really are.
tales of love.
every 6 monthes or so, she falls in love again.
but she really does--
fully, and wildly and madly.
I love her faith in new beginnings.
she's the sister I met when I was 6.
more like me than my real sister of the same name.
I wish...
that I didn't forget to cry when I need to.
I will not be a meteor.
I will not be afraid of failure
or success
or my own ever-widening shadow
I announced tonight that my 30th year will be the year of giving up--
as a way of new beginnings.
I will give up on ever looking like a 19 year old again
er.
I guess the rest of the stuff I listed is either not pertinent or not for public knowledge.
it's 11:11...make a wish...
did you guys know that if you bite into a Life Savers brand Wint-O-Green mint, in the dark, there is actually a visible spark?
it's true.
it was my best pickup line of the 90s.
I mostly used it on mormon missionaries (19-21 and CUTE--it was a pre-req, I swear)
but it was hot.
I was a true good girl back then...
my wild side was more like a stripe--
a pin stripe--
at that point.
ah well.
I should probably stop typing now.
mostly because I'm still drunkish and I need to be getting to sleep soon.
have I told you lately, that I love you?
probably not.
cuz i'm all sorts of basket-case-ish lately.
but I do.
I feel (perhaps erroneously) that my readers are a reflection of me...
so, since you guys are all fantastic in about 26 different ways, each--
thath makmes mee feel good.
and what in hte name of CHRIST did I just do with the keyboard????
...it wasn't typing that's for damn sure.
well.
have a great night.
don't forget to floss. |
posted by Bored Housewife at
9:48 AM
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