Oh what a day--
A haircut from the Magic Man,during which we got to catch up on each other's lives,
after which he straightened my hair.
Yum!!
And then off to the (say it with disdain) mall.
My poor, dear friend who was laid off and is now working towards her dream job took a job at the 3stee L@uder counter at a department store in the interim.
She is way over qualified, even to be the manager as she is.
BUT.
Today was the first day of Fr33 Gift day.
(sorry for all the funny spellings...just don't need that kinda traffic...ew...Plastics...)
SO.
Anyway...
the point is...
she did my makeup while I was there.
It is hard to tell in pictures, but it really was miraculous.
She made me look like....
like....
I don't know what.
Like someone more beautiful than I planned on being.
I used flash for these photos and did not touch up anything, and therefore, I have a bit of a glare on my forehead.
But I swear it looks awesome in real life.
And, since I finally remembered to upload pictures from the camera,
here is one of the sink at that hotel last week.
Ok, enough.
So we had fun making me purdy today, for nothing!
I had a quick lunch with D and then we stopped by the heinous BYU in order for her to use the internet for a moment (long story) and we ran into my doppleganger.
A girl from far across the earth, another whole way of life, another era, with a different background and a very different future.
But yet...
I am drawn to her.
And we look the same(ish).
Very odd.
Maybe she can tame the surly beast that I could not.
Maybe it is untameable.
But anyway, it was fun to see her unexpectedly.
And then I scurried on home, my shopping bags full of luxurious items for my hair and skin.
I am waiting with held breath for the flu that everyone else has...
will it strike me next?
I am visited by ghosts...
ghosts of life, ghosts of dreams, ghosts of aching hearts and ghosts of unknown thoughts.
Yesterday, as my I cowered under the shadow of a deadline,
my doorbell rang.
Against my better judgment, I loped up the stairs and opened my door.
Missionaries.
Adorable missionaries.
Angelically make-outable missionaries.
Bah.
So I sighed and said, "I don't have time for this. I'm sorry. Have a good day."
But in the moment between the door opening and me finding the words I was lost in the infinite space between telling them everything--who I am, the path I've walked, the choices I am happy to have made, my current beliefs--and flipping them the bird.
I wanted to scream at them, to unleash all my fury on them.
I wanted to say, "I have a deadline, but if you'll come back in an hour, and make out with me, you can talk to me about joseph smith all you want!"
I wanted to moon them, flash them, spit on them.
I wanted to vomit on them, cook for them, take their pants off.
I was frozen.
It felt like a year passed, as I stood there deciding, letting my fear of having no article to turn in rock my rational thought into dust.
and then TODAY.
At the horrific mall, a guy was selling Mormon cartoon videos from one of those kiosks.
His pitch goes as follows, "Have you received your free Scripture video yet, ma'am?"
I kept walking, tossing a curt, "No," over my shoulder.
Unfortunately, I had to walk past him in my reentry to the store where my friend works.
He caught my eye, I don't know how.
Smiling, he asked if I had changed my mind.
"No. Not in ten years, nor will I," I said, returning his smile.
As I stroke past, "How about 11?"
I laughed. "No."
"...12?"
I wanted to kiss him.
Hmmm...I'm noticing a trend...
God is taunting me.
Making me feel attraction for these objects of my disgust.
Harumph.
Serves me right.
Dirty old man, indeed.
I am also going to the Mormon cannery tomorrow with a girl friend and a few of her (mormon) friends...
this is a couple of hours of volunteer time at the cannery in exchange for the right to purchase stuff.
...the gots some goood dried apples....and refried beans....
fuck me.
I should have gotten out of here while I still could!!!
Fuckers.
I'm getting sucked in, aren't I?
Well.
As long as they let me:
1. s-a-y the FUCK word
2. fuck myself
3. watch R-rated movies
4. drink any/all alcohol that I choose
5. smoke stuff when/if I want to
6. watch porn
7. lie, cheat, steal, plunder, murder, rape, pillage.......
uh...
yeah. |
posted by Bored Housewife at
7:05 PM
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